Lt.HR.:
Lt-HR strolling onto the bridge, looking around, intrigued with all the gauges and lights blinking everywhere. Noticing a large brass skeleton key sticking up from the console....reaching for it and thinking better of that. Doing my stretches to stay limber....and plopping down in the Captain's chair.

Awful quiet up here - wonder what the big deal-e-o is with driving the ship? All I see is clear blue water and off to the port side...a couple pylons down the pier is the DDD Lounge . Ahhh, the life of a cruise ship Captain....it's sure easier than handling those difficult HR duties I usually encounter on a daily basis.

What's this???? Looking left and right, up and down to see if anyone is around. Cool, it's the RED PHONE - must be Captain's StrawBerry. How sweet of Captain to leave this here so I can check my emails. Why, I'm told that I can even surf and chat on these new-fangled gadgets! Interesting....it only has one button and it says BRAV*.... adjusting my bi-focals, bobbing my head up and down....can't seem to get that word in focus...... Oh well, it must be the shortcut button to surf the internet. Guess I'll just press it and............ Oh hi E-CCO.....what's happening in the cannon world today? And Lt-HR puts the StrawBerry down for now.



E-CCO:
Good morning Lt-HR.....sure is quiet around here today...I bought you another cup of java and a blueberry muffin.....but we have to remember to leave no crumbs behind (you know how some of the others get)

E-CCO sits in the Co-Captains chair and looks out at the beautiful blue waters.....ahhhhhh what a great morning..... eh Lt-HR.

Did you get the memo from SC too? You know it seems we have been putting an awful lot of OT in lately.

So what were you doing when I came in?



Lt.HR.:
Oohhhh, fresh ground coffee with a hint of hazelnut....my favorite! I'll have to save the muffin though because I'm watching my waistline! Gotta fit into that string bikini in October when we cruise! BTW....I'm all about the "no crumb left behind" campaign.

So, anyway......I was just checking out Captain's StrawBerry. I think it's one of those new wireless cellphone thingies that keeps you connected to the internet and email and all that fun stuff. I was about to push this button........but I can't read what it says. Cingular, Verizon, Poupon....Brav......I just can't make out the carrier name on the button. Whaddya think it says E-CCO?



E-CCO:
Lt-HR........that red phone is NOT a strawberry!! Look at the styling, it is way too big...and do you see a QWERTY anywhere on it? And where is the screen I ask you?

If you are going to learn anything up here on the Bridge, you are going to have to crack open the Captain's Bridge Manual and do some real studying....you know it is not easy to pass the ship driving 101 course, and you are not going to be able to just cruise through that class without doing some real work......so let's see if you can figure what this is without me telling you....now go get the manual and see if you can find the answer......



E-CCO:
E-CCO opens the Bridge Log and puts in the 11:30 entry........
"Waters are calm, sky is clear, slight wind from the S. Lt-HR was on Bridge alone for a couple minutes, but there appears to be no damage done. Lt. has been curious with the red phone... and I had her check the manual. I have also schduled an appointment with the eye Dr to check her perscription. Good thing SC & Captain are not on the Bridge this morning with E-CCO & Lt-HR....they both would have had heart attacks"



Lt.HR.:
Oops! Note to self....buy Captain a StrawBerry for Captain's Day. He obviously needs one if he's still using this old-fashioned contraption that's missing the base and screen and has a rotary dial!

Okay now, let's see......running index finger along the book-spines.... reading every title in search of the Captain's Bridge Manual. Oh my, this one looks interesting... 101 Fun Ideas for Mustard and oh goodness, this one is pretty dog-eared....let's see what it is.... Colonel Mustard meets Petunia Plushbottom in the Study! (tsk-tsk Captain!) Shaking my head....back to business....ahhh, here it is.

As Lt-HR slides the manual from the shelf, years of dust cascade down upon her, making the air thick with a yellow powdery-like cloud. Coughing and sneezing, Lt-HR stumbles away from the bookshelf, rubbing her eyes and covering her mouth to avoid any further assault.

Okay, I found the manual......now let's see, just how difficult can this really be? And Lt-HR giggles as she thinks of that funny word E-CCO used - QWERTY rhymes with thirty (surely not SC's age) rhymes with dirty....and that's definitely what Captain's bookshelf was.......



E-CCO:
Ahhhhhhh-chooooooo......Lt-HR...is that you trailing all that dust, or is it Pigpen?

I see you found the manual......have you found the answer yet?

And now what is so funny....have you been in the "library" already today?



SC:
SC strolls the decks of MOS on her way to the Bridge...... So far everything looks good.

Hhmmmm, E-CCO has recorded something in the B book. Whew! She didn't leave Lt-HR alone long enough for her to get in trouble.

What's this, Lt-HR needs her eyes checked! Guess that would be a good thing for when she has to be on the Bridge; I mean it's not like she ever goes to the Library and needs them for that purpose!

Now, what is this about Captains Strawberry? I don't know that Captain would like Lt-HR playing with his Strawberry....................... then again, maybe he would!

Oh my, what is the Captains Bridge Manual doing out? That's only for Captains! Not even SC looks at Captains Bridge Book!! Better put this away but gosh, the last time I saw it, it was covered in dust. How can I get dust back on there?